The Joy of Parenting

I love being a mum. It’s such a privilege seeing two wee people develop and watch their characters and confidence shine. Having watched other people’s children develop into young adults for many years, it still amazes me how much my own delight me as they grow.

I’m not a believer of categorising people, particularly children, but as I watch my two, I wonder if their characters will really change that much as they grow older. Yes, they will become (I hope) even more confident and develop their skills which will in turn change their attitudes and way of living life, but will their core characters become any different?

I am reminded of when my eldest was in nursery and we attended his first parents evening. Being on the other side of the fence was quite nerve racking and I wondered if I could put my teacher hat to one side and purely tackle the situation from a parents point of view. I found myself listening to his teacher and analysing everything that was being said (much to my own annoyance!). It was when the teacher kept referring to the fact that he liked to play with ’small world toys’ particularly, that I couldn’t help but wonder why this was an issue, particularly when his teacher agreed he would play with other children and interacted well with the adults. Even as a very young child, my eldest loved time to himself. He’s a very sociable lad, but after a while he likes to have his ‘me’ time. He loves books and toys, making up endless adventures with his incredible imagination. The way I see it, he has the best of both worlds. The ability to interact and communicate, but also the ability to be independant and not require constant attention from other people. Sometimes he has an old head on his young shoulders, and perhaps sometimes he thinks too much, but that’s the way he is and who is anybody to try and make him be any different. Too often these days do children have to act and behave in particular ways, so that a box can be ticked to say they’ve fitted into a that box.

My youngest on the other hand is currently a totally different kettle of fish and people keep telling me he suffers from ’second child syndrome’. I think that’s probably true, but definately only in part. I keep saying that he’d have a party with himself in an empty room and still manage to trash the place. That tends to make people laugh, but he really would. He loves to be in the thick of things and we experience things with him that we never did with his brother. I look at them both and wonder whether the youngest will become more streetwise and watch out for his brother or whether his fearless attitude will somehow become curbed when he too starts nursery and school. Either way, they will both continue to amaze me I’m sure. My only wish is for them to be happy and be themselves, whomever that may end up being.

~ by zoewalker on October 11, 2009.